appmntnr6

Turning 21, Guys and Many Tears

2009-07-20T22:57:43Z

Well as I said in my previous post I was turning 21 and I was supposed to meet a guy that I met on EHarmony. My 21st was totally amazing once I got home! The actual day sucked as I spent most of it alone, and the day after I was going home so that I could go out to eat with my mom and dad and they could buy me my first legal drink. Well...on my way home I got my first speeding ticket. I am still very incredibly pissed about that! I have been driving for 5 years, and that day it was like 5 years and a day, and I had never gotten a ticket before.

Anyway...enough about that upsetting topic! Mom and dad took me to Bravo! to eat and I had a Tuscan Sunrise. It was really good. I also got to have a creme brule for the first time. It was very yummy! Then we went to Caribu for coffee. It was great. Then the next night Misty and Nicole took me out to Chili's and to the bowling alley for cosmic bowling. I had a margarita and 3 shots at Chili's then at the bowling alley I had a smirnoff, a shot, a sex on the beach and a jolly rancher. I was feeling very nice. I was not drunk and not even tipsy. But I was feeling good.

So I got to meet Joel that weekend and he turned out to be amazing! I really am falling for him...and I think it has been a little too fast but he is really a great guy! There are some rough edges that I will have to deal with if I decide to go into a relationship with him. I'm not sure that he is going to be the one that I decide to go with...there is another guy that I get to meet this weekend. I really can't wait to meet him. We seem to be on the same wavelength about things and we have this nonchalant way to talk about interesting situations. I have to say he had me in stiches today!

Back to Joel. As I said, I am falling for him, and it's hard. He left yesterday to go back to Iraq and I have been a mess since Saturday and he hadn't even left! It was totally crazy! I was sitting just chatting with him and I burst into tears! I couldn't stop crying for a good 10 mins. Then yesterday when he was at the airport in Atlanta waiting for his flight over there, I just couldn't help it! I was bawling!! I haven't cried that hard since Michael left to go to boot camp! I felt a little rediculus!

But yes...that has been life pretty much! That's all I have to say!

HAY HAY HAY!!!

2009-07-01T17:12:15Z

LOL! I realize that it has been...gosh....forever since I have posted to this thing. To be honest...I forgot that I had it! LOL! So that means there is A LOT to update on!!

-Zach and I are no longer together...I broke up with him almost a year ago now!
-I took off fall semester last year and just stayed home working at the daycare
-I dated Marty Sabo for 2 months...he broke up with me over facebook
-I met a guy online and got to actually met him...he is a sweetheart...but he was hung up on his ex...they are engaged now
-He is in the Navy
-I got an eharmony account
-I have met a few people on it
-One I'm actually supposed to meet this weekend
-He's going to be home on leave for 2 weeks then he goes back to Iraq
-He is really sweet and nice
-I came back up to Boone for spring semester
-I also just finished summer session one
-I have been going to therapy
-I'm going home today
-I turn 21 in 7 days
-I'm going on a 7 day Caribbean cruise in 45 days
-My birthday present from my parents

Well that's about it for now...I will prob. update again today or tomorrow....

Best time of my life

2008-05-21T17:01:26Z

I have had the pleasure of meeting Misty's "brother" and have had a wonderful time with it. He is SOOOO hott! I am so glad that I finally got to meet him! We got in the hot tub with him the other night and we got in a water fight and then he dunked me! It was sooooo funny! Then he decided that he was going to give me the most amazing back massage ever! Then Misty left us out there by ourselves and we were just chillin and he kissed me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG!! The most amazing kisser EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have been on cloud 9 since Saturday night!!!!! I got to finally talk to him some today and we MIGHT get together and hang tonight! I HOPE SO! He gave me a hug earlier! I couldn't be any happier! If cards are played right.........I might become his!!!!!

Give me a 10 for Seether's "Biggest Music Fan"

2008-04-18T13:31:13Z

Give me a 10 for Seether's "Biggest Music Fan"

School

2008-04-08T19:33:03Z

Dang.
School is almost done
There are 3 weeks left of regular classes
then we have finals!
WOW!
This semester has FLOWN by!
It is crazy!
I'm trying to find a job for the summer
I have put in a few applications and need to put in more
If you have any ideas....let me know!
I really need a job that will pay well
I need to save up
so hopefully if I'm up here again next year
I can pay for an apartment.
There are no rooms on campus
So I really need cash like yeah
I can't wait for the semester to be over
I'm so burnt out
and ready to be home!!

I get to re-paint my room
I'm not sure what color I want to paint it
I do want to paint it before I move all my stuff back in from here
I can tell ya that much!
So if all goes well
I will get it done like right after I get home!!
Well thats all for now!!

OMG!!!!

2008-01-22T23:49:29Z

HEATH LEDGER DIED!!! WHAT IN THIS WORLD?? CAN YOU BELIEVE IT??????????

SSSSSNNNNNNNOOOOOOOWWWWW!!!!

2008-01-17T17:50:36Z

That's right people!
It SNOWED!!!
I woke up this morning and looked out the window....
and saw a....
WINTER WONDERLAND!!
It is soooooo beautiful!!
I swear I'm just like a little kid...
when it comes to snow!
I love it sooo much!
So Betsy and I decided that we were going to go...
outside...
in the snow....
to play...
and take lots of wonderful pics!!
We had a blast!!
Thats all for now!

Beka Leigh

PS....I start my new job tonight at the call center! Wish me luck!!

One crazy night

2008-01-14T21:41:48Z

Ok. So me and misty went on a mission to get some pot from her friends house. It was sooo funny. She had told us that it was in a hoodie. So we get to her room and one of the kids is in there. So we just grab the hoodie and some other clothes and leave. So I'm sitting in the car trying to stuff the bag into a blunt container. The next night we go to nicole's to smoke it. So we all shared a blunt then we took hits off the bong. It was actually nasty to me. I prob. will only do it one more time. It's nothing to write home about it. Anyway, we go inside and I ask if there is anything to drink and I go to get a pepsi and I start to feel the high. I couldn't help but smile. And we all started laughing and we couldn't stop. Finally I decided that I was going to focus on family guy and try to not pay attention to them so I wouldn't laugh. I was totally zoned out on the family guy. The funny thing is I felt like I was sleeping. And oh yeah....I got the munchies. I was eating nachos....and they were good. Needless to say that was one absolutly crazy night. It was fun. And a night to remember always.

Beka Leigh

What a day and a half!!

2008-01-06T18:28:36Z

I know that it has been forever since I have posted to this journal. I hope to start doing so more often!!!

ok...
-first thing is..
-waking up to yelling and screaming
-then I hit the shower.....
-then I went to the park to just get away
-called Zach
-went to his house for a bit
-then I went to pick up a cake
-for my cousins 16th b-day
-don't EVEN get me started on that one
-disc with YAM
-home
-Misty's house
-Michaels
-park
-Best Buy
-Chilis
-back to Misty's
-now I'm home

So yeah. My parents were arguing over the stupidest thing this morning....I was like whatever. I tried to go back to sleep but that didn't work to well for me so I got a shower and got myself ready to go out. So I went to the park....but it just wasn't the same smoking without Misty. It was just boring by myself so I called Zach. I was glad that I called Zach cause I missed him. The bast part of that was getting to see browine. So then I went to go get the cake! My cousin just turned 16 and I'm still wondering why they decided to come here for a party. Like I was TOTALLY heated about it. I guess I just have a hard time with 2 aspects of the whole thing. 1 is it was her 16th b-day.....2 NONE of my family decided to show up on my 16th birthday. So why the hell should we be expected to be there let alone it be at our house. I'm still really pissed about it......but I guess I need to get over it. The biggest thing is that I had to miss going to see Liz today. I was even more heated about that. On top of waking up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. So,,,,I decided that I wasn't going to be trapped in the house much longer and went with YAM to play disc golf. So my dad called me while I was there and telling me that it was a selfish thing to do even though he and mom both said that it was ok that I went. So I got even more heated. So I got home just in time to see them before they left. Then I sat and ate some food....I hadn't had anything to eat all day and I was hungry and had a blistering headache.

So we sat down and watched some tv and misty called me. So after I finished watching 1 show I left to go over there. We then went over to Michaels cause I'm looking for a new scrapbook. Then we went to the park to go smoke. We smoked like 4 cigs then decided to go to Best Buy cause I wanted to play guitar hero. And the funny thing is when we got to the park there were these 3 guys and they left well before we did and when we got to Best Buy...we saw their car and sure enough they were there. LOL!!!! So Misty got a text message from Dawn telling her she was going to Chili's. So we met her there and got to meet her boyfriend. Needless to say I think he is quite hot. But he is 29 years old!!!! Wow! Enough said about that. So we were sitting there drinking drink talking and smoking. The waiter said at one point that he was going to just have to bring the hose over there to me. I had water. I was REALLY thirsty and had like 8 glasses of water. I think I'm still peeing it out! LOL!

Yesterday was uber long and all I want to do today is relax! Me and Misty are going to church! YAY! I won't be alone. I think my parents did the nasty last night and I'm COMPLETLY grossed out!! LOL!! And for some reason they arn't getting out of the bed. I guess they wore themselves out!!!! HAHAHAHA!!!!!! Anyway....*still totally grossed out* Its just going to be me and misty this morning! Well...I better go finish getting ready!!

Till next time
Beka Leigh

Reality....

2007-07-30T02:22:31Z

...is finally starting to set in again for me. Now I have tons of responsibilities that I have to take care of. I have a car payment that has to be made every month...that means I have to have a job that pays pretty well. If I don't make the payments....my car will be taken from me!! And I REALLY don't want that to happen, because I love my car. I'm having to worry about my student loan coming through for me. I have 17 hrs of classes that I'm taking. My schedule is as follows:

Monday: Math 1110 9:00-9:50, Chemistry 1101 11:00-11:50,
Geography 1010 1:00-1:50, Theater 2011 2:00-2:50
Tuesday: Math 1110 9:00-9:50, Economics 2030 2:00-3:15
Wednesday: Math 1110 9:00-9:50, Chemistry 1101 11:00-11:50,
Geography 1010 1:00-1:50
Thursday: Economics 2030 2:00-3:15, Chemistry 1110 3:30-6:20
Friday: Math 1110 9:00-9:50, Chemistry 1101 11:00-11:50,
Geography 1010 1:00-1:50

And somewhere between all that I will have to have a job. I'm quite nervous about this year...I mean jeez!!! Chem, math, econ....those are going to KILL me!!!! Especially the math. But hey...it's the major I want. I just hope that I can keep my grades up and have a job all at the same time! I applied for a job at the library
so hopefully I will get that job. It shouldn't be too hard.

My boyfriend's dad was in the hospital this week and now is in rehab to get his strength back. My dad's mom was also in the hospital because she was hemorrhaging. So I wasn't too thrilled...because I had to go see her to make my dad happy.

My dad was threating to throw me out of the house if I didn't find a job. The daycare let me go just before my birthday. Which totally sucked!!! I was soooo pissed. So then I got that threat from him...so I got a job and I have been working there for about 2 weeks and I'm only on the schedule for 2 more days. So I'm highly ticked off....I need the money so that I can make my car payment.

My birthday was quite uneventful. I got taken out to eat by my boyfriend and got a flat screen tv from my parents. JOY! Needless to say...I turned 19 and no one really cared much.

I really can't wait to go to school. I'm ready to leave burlington. Don't get me wrong...I love being right around the corner from my bestest...and I'm going to miss her very much. But I have got to get out of this house! It feels like a matter of life or death. My parents gang up on me and just YELL AND YELL at me for no freaking reason. It burns me up inside that they can treat me that way and then say that they love me. If they really loved me they would help me pay for college!!!! But are they....HELL NO!!!! I feel sometimes like I am in a prison. So most of the time I just get out of this house and go hang out with friends. What really makes this easy is that my dad isn't home during the week! THANK GOD!!! I would die if he were.

So the long and the short of it is I have had a weird summer...and am ready to leave here!!!!!! That's all for now! Might write again tomorrow!!

<3 Beka Leigh

My birthday weekend

2007-07-07T16:59:44Z

Well...tomorrow is my birthday. I will be 19...2 more years and I can legally drink! WooHoo. I have to say though that this has probablly been the worst b-day ever. My boyfriend told me yesterday that he wanted to come home to see me b/c he missed me and wanted to spend time w/ me b/c of my b-day. Well...he gets home at 3 and doesn't answer his phone untl 7:30. We were going to go skating, but he made sure that he fucked those plans up. So we ended up going to putt putt with his friend Cameron. Well.......they have spent the WHOLE week together...I understand that he is only home for the week...but you would think that my bf would want to spend a little time with his gf for her b-day. Tomorrow is sunday...I'm not going to be able to do much tomorrow b/c of church. So....I guess I will get no time with him. Today he is going to southpoint with Cameron...and I'm home alone w/ no one to hang out with. This weekend TOTALLY sucks monkey poo!!!

I hate my life again! Don't cry for me NC! For one day it will all be alright!!

Beka Leigh

Spring Break...and other fun stuff!

2007-03-21T01:15:35Z

Well...Spring break is over....and it sucks that it is!

My spring break was absolutly wonderful! I drove around b-town like a chicken with my head cut off! It was uberly fun! I also hung out with a guy at Netpath A LOT!! Jonathan is soooooo funny and sooooo adorable!!! I had sooo much fun with him and Kristy! Also went by Williams and saw some old teachers....that was a blast! Especially getting to see Beamon and Upchurch! My 2 favorite teachers in the whole school!!

My dad's mom is finally out of my house! We moved her out friday! I was SOOOOOOOOO happy! The bitch is FINALLY gone!! The house is SOOO quiet now! No more hearing her rant and rave to herself and no more hearing her blowing her freaking nose!! HORRAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Saturday I had a most wonderful day! I went with Zach and his family to a John Deere thing then we hung out at his house for a bit then went to the driving range then to g-boro. He took me to my second favorite restraunt....P.F. Changs for our 6 month! He also gave me roses! I was surprised!

So then early Monday morning......4:30......I was up and ready to come back here. It was a fun ride and then daddy took me to waffle house....and it was SOOOOO yummy!!! Then when I got here...I passed out for about an hour....then went to classes....then wrote my rough draft. Went to Happy's with a big group of friends! Then I went to Nikki's house. We drank and watched American Pie! There was a lot....5.....yeah! After the movie we went upstairs to go to bed. We cuddled...then later made out....then a little after that ended up having sex....it was very interesting. So maybe I'm a little bi.....hmmmmm. I'm not sure...I'm sooo confused about the whole thing! She is a lot of fun to be around and it was just fun overall being there! So yeah.

That has been life here recently! Very exciting! That's all I have to say about it all for now! Later!

-Beka

When you think you have friends!

2007-03-04T08:58:03Z

Just wait until they bring their best friends around you! If that person says they care about you soooo much....just wait. Wait patiently.....then their real colors will show! Yes....Will and his best friend Emily talked soooo much shit about me tonight!

e o Dregan (12:04:09 AM): yeah he was kinda talking down to you

CSR Laforet (12:04:09 AM): yeah

CSR Laforet (12:04:11 AM): no kidding

N e o Dregan (12:04:35 AM): there saying your jealous now or something

N e o Dregan (12:04:42 AM): you are*

CSR Laforet (12:04:55 AM): what the hell am I jealous of??

N e o Dregan (12:05:34 AM): oh snaps

CSR Laforet (12:05:46 AM): \please go with us

CSR Laforet (12:05:57 AM): I need someone to keep me from killing him

N e o Dregan (12:06:04 AM): yeah there saying lots of crap about you now

N e o Dregan (12:06:05 AM): lol

CSR Laforet (12:06:05 AM): yeah

N e o Dregan (12:06:18 AM): 'get on a treadmill'

N e o Dregan (12:06:20 AM): or something

CSR Laforet (12:06:15 AM): I'm surew

N e o Dregan (12:06:27 AM): for your next date

N e o Dregan (12:06:34 AM): emily said

N e o Dregan (12:06:40 AM): to will

N e o Dregan (12:07:02 AM): you didn't hear that for me

N e o Dregan (12:07:07 AM): from me*

CSR Laforet (12:07:02 AM): yeah

N e o Dregan (12:07:56 AM): there just being ignorant

CSR Laforet (12:08:03 AM): please go

CSR Laforet (12:08:05 AM): PLEASE

N e o Dregan (12:08:32 AM): beka just don't go with them

CSR Laforet (12:09:01 AM): who else is going to go with me so that I don't get like raped or something

N e o Dregan (12:09:21 AM): i mean dont go out tonight

CSR Laforet (12:09:20 AM): I want to

N e o Dregan (12:09:53 AM): emily said "does she look like the michelin woman on top?"

N e o Dregan (12:10:02 AM): will said "i don't know her on that lvl"

So just incase they don't think I have proof.......I do...in fact.....have the fucking proof!!!! He can take his skanky friend and they can go fuck if that's what they want! At least I don't have to look like a little fucking slut to get guys! My boyfriend loves me just the way I am! I don't have to go around in tight ass clothes and shitty looking make up and hair dos.............I just have to be me! That little bitch thinks that she knows me....well she doesn't know shit! I would fuck her up in a matter of seconds.....and not in the good way! She thinks that she is the shit....when in truth....she is just another fucking poser out in the world!! Did I mention that I fucking hate posers?? I didn't think I did....so yeah.......I hate people like her! At least I know how to be me! I don't have to have this veil of extreme poserness to hide the true me! HAHA!! Poserness.......new word! But anyway....I say FUCK THAT SHIT!!!!! I can't take his bull anymore................he likes me my fucking ass.....I knew he didn't!! If he did...he wouldn't walk all over me and treat me like shit....I'm not going to take it!

On a lighter note....instead of going to rumors tonight....I sat with my buddy Brian, Will's roommate, and we watched Hitch. It was absolutly wonderful to sit back, relax and watch a movie! Then it was really funny when will walked in.....I bet he thought that me and Brian had done something....when all we did was watch a movie! LOL!!!!! Though in my opinion, he is really hott and all! It's the truth...but yeah. He is turning out to be a great friend!! We had lots of laughs tonight! And I got a lot off my chest about how will was acting! I don't know what I would have done without Brian tonight!

Well...I'm really tired......so I do believe that it is bed time! Nighty night!!

-Beka Leigh

"Who the fuck you think you're fucking with I'm the fucking boss!!"

appmntnr6 @ 2007-02-20T13:51:00

2007-02-20T19:03:48Z

Ok...So I talked to Amy today...it's not her fault that she isn't rooming with me next year...it's gay Appalachian's rules!!!!!! I'm like FUCK THAT SHIT!! Anyway yeah...so I'm not guaranteed a room on campus...this really sucks ass and has me worried as everything...my parents arn't going to pay for an appartment...at least I don't think. I would hope they would...but I'm not totally sure.

I'm going home this weekend....thank the Lord! I get to get away from this hell hole for a weekend. The drama keeps building up and it's about to drive me freaking crazy! Will is like OMG...getting on my nerves about this whole liking me thing! I just don't know what to do b/c he wants to always talk and get to know me better....BUT I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!! Do I need to spell it out? B-O-Y-F-R-I-E-N-D and not to mention I'm going to A-P-P-A-L-A-C-H-I-A-N next year......so he most likely will never see me again in life!!!!so why can't he just chill out? He kept me up till 3:30 this morning talking...I would have been in bed at 3 if it hadn't been for him continuing to talk online! GOOOOOLLLLY!!!!!!!!!

I miss my baby soooo much! I hope that I will be able to see him this weekend! YAY!!!! I can't wait until next year! I will be able to see him when I want...and we will be able to go out on dates and so on and so forth! I just can't wait! I hope that we will be together forever...but then again.....forever scares me! I mean...its FOREVER.......but I love him! So why does forever scare me? I don't think that it's him as much as it is forever.......scary thought!

I'm SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO ready for this semester to be OVER!!!! I HATE HISTORY!! TIME FOR CLASS!!

Backstabbing "friend" and other matters

2007-02-19T18:37:49Z

You know what I hate? People that repeatadly stab you in the back! Like its freaking crazy! Why did I get back into a friendship with someone that has stabbed me in the back two times already?? It's fucking insane! I'm soooo tired of her bull shit! She says that I'm her best friend yet she does this to me! She promised me before I even sent my application into Appalachian that she would be my roommate if I got in! I got in, and who is she rooming with? That dirty fucking skank Amy Doyle! It pisses me off and I just can't take it anymore! I don't know what to do! Sometimes I think that I should just stop being friends with her!!!! But I can't do that......cause she hangs out with Zach! It just PISSES ME OFF TO NO END!!!!!!!!!!!! I am almost to the point where I hate her!!! Yeah...that's all about that subject....on to the next:

So the bitch isn't moving out of my house!!!! I'm sooooo pissed about that! I'm going home this weekend and she best not say one fucking word to me! I am SOOOO sick of her crazy ass self! Hitting my momma the way she did! OHHHH I COULD BEAT THE BITCH DOWN!!!!!!!!!!! I hate this woman SOOOOOO much! My dad should NEVER have brought her over here! She has been here over a year and I can't take it anymore! I'm glad I'm out of the house...just now my mom needs to leave my dad so that she is not a slave to that bitch anymore! I want the best for my mom and the best is leaving my dad! So yeah!

I'm smack dab in the middle of drama city!! It just needs to end! Ok...yeah...I'm so glad that now I have a place to rant on and on about my problems!!!!!

Beka Leigh

WOW!

2007-02-19T01:26:36Z

So yeah! I need a place to write down all my thoughts! Life is getting crazy and out of hand!!! Will likes me like OMG crazy!

Recently this girl I've known for a while and I have started hanging out more...just as friends. Somehow or other I'm starting to fall for this girl, and fast. There is something about her that makes her standout, makes her different from the others...but I don't know what that thing is. There is this huge collection of little things about her that make one gigantic pile. There are a couple of problems though. 1) She's already in a relationship. 2) She's transferring at the end of the semester. 3) This is the big one...She's a devout Christian. I on the other hand am a free thinker, and I can not, and will not, claim affiliation to any religion unless I fully believe in it. Yes there are lessons that can be learned from the Bible, but there are several elements that I refuse to believe. The existence of Jesus and what the Bible claims about him, for example. These three factors put me in one hell of a pickle. I really want to get to know her better and see what comes of it, but again those three things are major hurdles; and it would take a miracle for this situation to make a 180. hmm...I can't think of anything to put up here so I guess I'll just leave it at this. Oh! one more thing. Posting a note like this is VERY uncharacteristic of me. Normally I would keep something like this to myself. So posting this note is kinda sad.

That is what he had to say about me in a facebook post! I just don't know what to do!! I love my Zachy with al my heart and I AM NOT ABOUT TO LET HIM GO!!!! I have worked WAYYY too hard to get him and keep him this long! He is the love of my life and I want to be with him for the rest of my life!!

So what am I supposed to do? Part of me wants to sit and talk to him about it! But then part of me just wants to sit here and talk about it online! I'm SOOO uberly confused!! It really sucks!

I mean...he is really sweet and funny, but he doesn't believe in God and will not change his mind about Christiananity!! And being a christian is MAJORLY important!! So yeah! It would NEVER work between the two of us! So I don't know why I'm soo confused about this whole thing! Its crazy!! I'm constantly thinking WTF??????? Cause he likes me! He knows that I have a bf and want to marry him in the future! So yeah!

What to do?? SOOOOOO CONFUSING!!!!!

Beka Leigh